Need Signs.

I let my imagination run away with me sometimes. I see signs in various places that need explanation or a few additional words to bring out the real meaning. Like "Under New Management" which I change to "Under New Management with the same old crappy policies". "Wait help wanted" like I need help waiting. "All You Can Eat or as much of this swill as you can get down". "I have an Honor Roll student at Oakland County Jail". If anyone has got some others I would like to see them.